There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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