went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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