Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
