How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Randomize
