So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
It was confusing and full of hummus
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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