Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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