Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
