The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
