so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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