Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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