How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
