On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
