This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Randomize
