I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
