Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
