weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
