at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Randomize