About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
How drunk are you?
Completed.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
