She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I think pants incapable of making pants work
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
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