you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
