You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
