She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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