Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Randomize
