But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
