guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
