DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
