ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize