Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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