ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize
