my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
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