I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
