My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
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