we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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