you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I don't want my vagina anymore.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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