Apparently you make a good broom.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
