really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
