I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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