No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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