You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
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