I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Even my vagina gasped.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Randomize
