also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I wear drunk well.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
