I'm gonna have a badass scar
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
