i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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