in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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