uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Betty ford says i'm here all night
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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