Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize