i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize