Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize
