Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
