He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I came so hard my ears popped.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
